Sarge's sister plays tricks on her brother Sarge
After bidding the fair Lt. Linda (Sarge's wife) good-by, Sarge hits the road. In this case I-70 heading East. Back to his roots. His first stop will be at his little sister's, Hand-grenade Hanna. Her letter said that she would only be at home until 11:00 AM on Wed. so Sarge rolls the Suzuki up to 75 mph and stops only for gas breaks.
Finally Kansas City, Mo comes up on the horizon and he lucks out and hits town just before the rush hour traffic. Crazy people those KCMO'ers. They like to play polo with motorcycles. Safely through the worst of the traffic only a few miles are left before the turn off at Colombia, Missouri.
Now where is that paper that he wrote down the directions to sis's house?
Pulls over at the exit and searches the saddle bags, the fanny pack, the duffel bag. Where did it go? I had it right here he mumbles reaching into his pocket. And there it is in the pocket. Obvious the long ride has numbed Sarge in more places than his seat.
OK take the Academy exit, turn right at Broadway, follow it for 5 miles.
Then watch for the Quick Stop, turn right at the next street. Watch out for the burned out cars?
Yeah, little sister is living in a very poor neighborhood.
First house has a dozen people sitting on the porch, they all give Sarge the bird as he goes by.
Second house looks like it was burned in a fire, but as Sarge goes buy he can see people still living in there.
Third house has half a dozen cars in the yard all in various states of cannibalization. Forth house has Hard rock music coming out of the doors and windows so loud that it blows Sarges bike over to the other side of the street.
Finally the last house and it is in pretty good repair except for the graffiti painted on the walls and windows.
Sarge pulls up in front and parks the Suzuki. The door opens a crack and the front end of a 45 cal. Glock pokes out the door opening. When his helmet is off and goggles pulled down, the door opens up fully and little sister playfully shoots a few happy rounds off in the air, scattering the local gang bangers that were converging on Sarge and his motorcycle.
"Big Brother!" Hand-grenade Hanna shouts and grabs him in a death hug almost crushing his sternum. "You made it!"
"Let me go sis, I can't breath" chokes Sarge. And they hug some more and then go to the house. Little sister gives Sarge a large log chain and tells him where to chain the Suzuki to the house.
Sarge's sister, former Army Sargeant, former Cop, now Social Worker just talks and talks and talks. So much time to make up it seems. Finally she runs down and they trade old memories as she fixes supper.
"You like your new job sis?" Sarge asks.
"Love it!" Hanna says, "but it is hard on my figure. Never leave the house and spend a lot of time fixing food for the little abused kids."
"I can tell" says Sarge.
"Hey wait you bum!" Hanna rejoins, "Not all of us has perfect figures like you" And she laughs.
"You still running 5 miles like you used to in the Army
"No I haven't been out on the track or in the fields for years, guess I ought to get back in shape." she wistfully replies.
Finally everyone runs down and Sarge is sacked out on the spare bed. "Ahhhhh for a good nights sleep" he thinks.
In hardly a few hours it seems the lights blare on and Hand-grenade Hanna's loud Drill Sargent voice sounds loud and clear.
"ALRIGHT TROOPS OFF AND ON!"
There is Sarges sister decked out in combat boots and her PT uniform.
"Come on Sarge, you are the one that complained about my shape, now you are going to get me in shape if it kills you!"
"Ohhhh Noooo moans Sarge"
Very soon Hanna has pulled Sarge's hands off the door frame and they are jogging down the street. "Hup Hup Hup Double time Marchhh!" Hanna shouts.
"Groan" Sarge moans.
Two miles later Sarge is falling behind and whispers with his last breath, "Sis, don't you think we should take a break and get something to drink, coffee or anything?"
"Yeah big Brother, I am getting a little tired myself, must be in worse shape than I thought. What did you do with your pack? There was some water in it?"
"Lost it at the first turn I think," Sarge admitted.
"Come on the last three miles are mostly downhill" Hanna jubilantly shouts and the torture goes on.
Finally Sarge and little sister are laying on the porch huffing and puffing.
"Do you think you can get up and put the key in the door Sarge?" groans Hanna.
"I doubt it, but if you stand up I will tip you over and maybe you will land hard enough to break the door down," Sarge remarks.
"Very funny brother." she says as she struggles to her hands and feet with the key in her mouth.
Finally after a good breakfast Sarge and Hand-grenade Hanna are back in shape and breathing again.
But Sarge has to bid good bye.
"Got to see my grandkids today sis." Sarge tells her.
"OK big brother, I promise to be back in shape when you come through again." Hanna crosses her heart and her fingers behind her back.
"Bye sis, love ya."
"You be careful you big lug" Hanna says and playfully pushes him off the porch.
Ending this Chronicle Sarge rides off to see his grandkids.
To be continued: