Hmmmmm, interesting question. Is/was Jesus a vampire or a zombie?
I could be wrong but vampires never die...unless the silver bullet or the wooden stake to the heart theories are applied. Jesus, being fully man, not a vampire, died completely. I don't think there were bullets back then since there were no guns. He did get a spear in His side......and there was a "stake" involved depending on your particular view of Roman crucifixion but I'd say, no, Jesus wasn't a vampire.
As for Jesus being a zombie.......hmmmmm, zombies are depicted as the walking dead, right? They are usually depicted as to appear as they died. In other words their flesh is torn, they are bloodied up from some kind of physical harm that caused their death. They, like Jesus, die and then they come back to life. I can see where some might be confused over the two, Jesus and a zombie. They both were human and they both died horrible bloody deaths and they both came back to life. The difference in the two is eternally monumental though. The zombie is fated with the lethargic earthly wandering state causing fear and confusing where ever they go. Unless their head is cut off they supposedly carry on this way until a putrid decomposition takes place and their physical presence is jeopardized to the point that they can't ambulate and are eventually eaten by......another zombie. That's something else..there are always more than one zombie. It is my understanding that Jesus also died a horrible death; a sword in the side piercing His heart and lung, before that He was flogged to the point that His internal organs were exposed. Flesh and muscle were torn from the bones and then He was forced to carry His own "stake" upon which He would be crucified. After all that He died and was buried. So up to the here there are similarities to Jesus and and one of the zombies. Jesus rose from the grave in His "Perfected or Glorified" state. While He did still bear the wounds of the cross (stigmata) he was not in a putrefied state of decomposition. His presence was so perfect that few recognized Him as Jesus because they knew the state He was in at the time of burial. Even those who had not witnessed the flogging and crucifixion did not recognize Him because they knew full well what a Roman flogging and crucifixion entailed. So....Jesus perfect in physical presence post horrible death......zombies, pick one, any one......not so perfect. Jesus, the only one capable dieing such a propitiating death....zombies, apparently, innumerable and worth nothing. Jesus ascended to be with the Father, zombies.....wander around until they are eaten by other zombies. Jesus, recognized by some as the one and only "savior", zombies.....not so much saviorS.
Sooo, while a good question and I'm no expert, I'd say NO to Jesus being a vampire or a zombie. I realize that all of my references come from the bible and there are some who hold it's truth in suspect but that is all I have to recall from. On the other hand Hollywood movies make a good foundation for such discussions as well.
We're not that far apart...we're mainly using different sources to form our opinions. I'm interested in other opinion sources as well.
A nobody telling everybody about Somebody.
Lazarus on the other hand may fall into the catagory of zombie if you consider that he was raised from the dead by means outside his own capacity for life.
Very good, beech! Lazarus, Lazarus an interesting dude. Staying away from the bible and it's limiting influence, both historians Josephus and Eusebius mention Laz as a "good" friend of Jesus. Apparently, Jesus lived with him and his sisters (Mary & Martha) for a while. They all were very close. The bible tells us that Jesus cried when Laz died. The reasoning as to why He cried and didn't just raise him is more spiritual than your question request.
Physiologically speaking though, remember, zombies die, putrefy and decompose while they are supposedly in a horrible state of "life". Laz, on the other hand, died and was raised from the dead by Jesus to live a normal life. I love this story by the way. The story goes like this (Now I have to use the dreaded bible.).....Laz dies and is in the tomb for 4 days when Jesus finally arrives. Martha meets him on the road crying and boo hooing and says that if he (Jesus) had come earlier her brother would not have died. Then her sister, Mary, comes and says basically the same thing to Jesus. Shortly after these conversations Jesus cries with them both supposedly over the death of Laz (I have another opinion on that though.). Then Jesus tells them to move the rock from Laz's community grave (There were several/many in the same tomb.). There were other details, but moving on, Jesus states he is going to raise Laz from death! This is disconcerting to the sisters and the other Jews because he's been dead for 4 days now! Martha even warns Jesus about how Laz will be "stinking" at this point. Jesus, being God, knew this and said, "Lazarus, come out." A side note here...It is thought that Jesus called Lazarus by name for a reason, if he had merely said "Come out", then all of the occupants of the community tomb would have been raised. I don't know..not important to this story but certainly a hmmmm. Anyway, it was the custom/tradition to wrap the dead (burial cloth), before burial, similar to a mummy. Woven intermittently within the cloth were frankincense and myrrh...about 60 to 70 pounds of it. They were used for preservation and perfume (smell). This wrapping procedure basically secured the arms and legs in a mummy like way, therefore, when Jesus called Laz, he could not have just gotten up and walked out....he levitated!! Once Laz levitated from the tomb Jesus then tells the group of surrounding Jews to "unwrap" him (Laz). Lazarus then goes on to live a normal life, as normal as a "resurrected" man could live, and died an old man. There was no putrification, no disorientation, no decomposition relating to Laz either.
So, was Lazarus "maybe" a zombie? No! Laz was....another reason to believe!.
Interesting thought process but no potato.
A nobody telling everybody about Somebody.
well, what technically qualifies as a zombie is a hard thing to define, being fictional and all, but traditionally zombification was the most extreme curse to put upon one's enemy. Now, I have heard of people witnessing voodoo ceremonies and seeing the 'magic' actually work, but I believe David Blaine has more magic than any of the pagan/tribal shaman in the world. Resurrection on the other hand has always been a gift.