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Old 03-22-2016, 06:41 PM  
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Not raising Hogs...

Not raising Hogs...


From an article, “Spoilin’ The Broth”, by Bill Cook, in the Rockdale ( Texas ) Reporter dated February 11, 2016 on page 5A. A letter to the U.S. Secretary of Agriculture from one Jimmy Henry of Broken Arrow , OK



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Dear sir:



My friends, Wayne and Janelle over at Wichita Falls , received a check the other day for $1,000 from the government for not raising hogs. So, I want to go into the not raising hogs business.

I need to know your opinion on what the best breed of hogs not to raise? I want to be sure that I approach this venture in keeping with all government guidelines. I would prefer not to raise Razorbacks, but if that is not a good breed to not raise, then I can just as easily not raise Yorkshire’s or Durocs.

As I see it, the hardest part of this program will be keeping an accurate inventory of how many hogs I am not raising. My friend Wayne is excited about the future of this business. He has been raising hogs for 20 years and the most he ever made was $422 in 1988, until this year when he got your check for $1000 for not raising hogs.

If I get $1,000 for not raising 50 hogs, will I get $2,000 for not raising 100? I plan to operate on a small scale at first, holding myself down to about 4,000 which will give me $80,000 income the first year. Then I can afford an airplane.

Another thing, these hogs I’m not raising will eat 100,000 bushels of corn. I understand that you also pay farmers for not raising corn and wheat. Will I qualify for payments for not raising wheat and corn not to feed the 4,000 hogs I am not going to raise?

I want to get started not feeding as soon as possible as this seems to be a good time a year to not to raise hogs and grain. I’m also considering the not-milking-cows business so please send me any information you might have on that.

I assume that the government will consider me to be unemployed from all this non-production, so I plan to file for unemployment and food stamps.



Jimmy Henry

Henry Farms

Broken Arrow, OK
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Old 03-23-2016, 12:18 PM  
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I have a book BEST OF HILLBILLY a compilation of Jim Comstock's writings from WEST VITGINIA HILLBILLY. I think Jim's column was called the Comstock Load. Jim would have loved the above.
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Old 03-23-2016, 12:58 PM  
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He published stories like the farmer who visited his schoolteacher daughter in a neighboring town. She was embarrassed to serve him margarine rather than country butter but explained that she couldn't afford butter. He suggested that she barter with someone that received the government food commodities as they generally were given more than they could use and might be willing to barter. He told Jim about the fact that she was working and paying taxes so that those who were not could have butter while she ate margarine. They had a good laugh over it then suddenly stopped laughing as it wasn't funny anymore.
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