In the 1st grade I wet my pants. I was sent to the office to call home. I was behind the desk, trying to hide while my mom was called. Some big kids came in & asked why I was there. As cool as I could I explained that I was here so they couild call my mother. They asked why, & I told them that I had had an accident, thinking that they would not figure it out. But as I was talking, I got nervous & wet myself again, making a puddle that they could see from the other side of the desk. One of the guys pointed & laughed saying "Hey look, he's having another accident". It's really hard to look cool while you're making a puddle.
When I was in elementary school, I used to have this racing suit that I loved to wear. Like, zip from crotch-to-neck. No idea why, but I loved that thing - wore it every day. I wore it until it didn't fit me anymore.
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When I was in middle school, the entire school was called to an assembly in the gym. I had been feeling sick that day, but my mom still sent me to school on account of playing wolf too many times.
Everyone was seated in the bleachers listening to a speaker when I suddenly felt the urge to throw up. I started running to the bathroom, but I didn't make it in time. I through up all over the gym floor with every student and teacher watching me. I still remember that it was the pork and beans that my mother served me night before that made me sick and I will never eat them again.
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"The way to see by faith is to shut the eye of reason."
When I was in middle school, the entire school was called to an assembly in the gym. I had been feeling sick that day, but my mom still sent me to school on account of playing wolf too many times.
Everyone was seated in the bleachers listening to a speaker when I suddenly felt the urge to throw up. I started running to the bathroom, but I didn't make it in time. I through up all over the gym floor with every student and teacher watching me. I still remember that it was the pork and beans that my mother served me night before that made me sick and I will never eat them again.
Everyone in my family has nightmares, and we talk a lot in our sleep, so it comes out pretty evil sounding.
The first time my Brother slept over (It gets worse if we are in unfamiliar places, or drunk, we were both) after I started dating my wife, you could here us basically screaming obscenities and picking fights all over the apartment.
Back in junior high we used to have to do fitness tests, one at a time in front of the whole class. I was doing my sit ups, and a really cute girl was holding my feet, when all of a sudden I let loose an epic fart. Stinky and loud... I don't think she ever spoke to me again.
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