|
Okay, for the benefit of those of you who haven't had the benefit of living in Zone 6 (or visiting the Kirkwood area) I'm gonna tell you how -or rather WHAT- it is.
What it is... is Ms. Ann's Snack Bar at 1615 Memorial Drive. I recommend that you go at a time that's not usually a rush eating time. In any case, you're gonna likely be waiting a bit in the outside area, which feels a bit like a patio. You're gonna want to obey the "no cursing please" sign, and put your cell phone into airport mode.
Once you are invited up into the Holiest of Holies, by an approving glance given by the fellow who took your measure before, and refrained from asking you to leave because you didn't curse, use your cell phone or otherwise be rude to the other folks present, you will be seated at the smallest serving counter you ever saw. More than six people would be seated uncomfortably here, and Ms. Ann does not seat people uncomfortably.
So now you're in. You have two choices:
1 - The Ghetto Burger - a two-patty monstrosity that is higher than it is wide, by some Dagwood-inspired trick of physics.
or
2 - anything else.
It's still good. Remarkably good, as a matter of fact. But when you're scaling Mount Everest, you can opt for the peak... or anything else. Make no mistake: the Ghetto Burger is the peak. Everyone should try it, at least once, if only to be reminded, rather rudely, of your humanity. Forsooth! It is a mere sandwich. Yet it has your number; it is greater than your will and your body combined. You will remember your childhood picnics, exaggerated as if your mother was an obsessive/compulsive burger fiend. You will remember county fairs, diminished in hindsight, by both years and the sheer scale of the Ghetto Burger. You will grasp desperately for childhood fantasies of outlandish "grownup" comestibles and drinks that you cannot imagine enjoying... and here you will find yourself at home with the Ghetto Burger. Not so much a repast as a rite of passage, this rite commands a personality all its own for the vanquished foodie foe. You will moan. You will wish to loosen your pants. You may even briefly consider trespassing the "no cursing" ban.
But you will prevail. You will -regardless of body size- waddle to your waiting vehicle, ease it into Memorial Drive traffic, and begin the internal telling of your own personal Ghetto Burger myth.
You will eat other burgers. You will dine in other eccentric eating spaces, with other persnickity hosts or hostesses. But there is only one Ghetto Burger, and the day you undertook to slay that culinary dragon will remain forever etched in your mind. I recommend making it a good day,
|
Linear Mode
